This week, the book in focus is akin to last week’s book. The book, Embracing Me, is another in the series of books for young people and adolescents, with the mandate to prompt them into champions.
The book was written to tell young people to embrace who they are, and to make the most of what they have.
Reviewing Oluwatoyin Ogedengbe’s Embracing Me
Jointly published in 2022 by Sophos Books and Spring Publishing, Nigeria, Embracing Me was written by Mrs Oluwatoyin Ogedengbe, a teacher, speaker, mentor and child rights advocate.
Mrs Ogedengbe is a certified Character-Based Relationship and Sexual Integrity educator and a faith-based counselor.
She is the immediate past coordinator of the Child Protection Network, Oyo State.
Embracing Me is written to tell young people of today that the future holds multiple opportunities for them if they would cultivate steely self-esteem.
The author uses the story of her own upbringing in a low social and economic background and challenging teen years as a backdrop to encourage her readers.
The author writes that, as a teenager, she didn’t enjoy the privilege of adult guidance, and that she faced many struggles which she had to battle alone.
But this book is coming as her contribution towards making sure that teenagers do not have to wade through the murk of life dejected and deprived.
According to the author, (p19) the book is written to help teenagers and young people “to embrace who they are and become the best God created them to be.”
Against that backdrop, the author begins her story. She tells the story of her beginnings, the Lagos slums her family lived in and the poor sanitary conditions.
She mentions the effect of the prevailing social and economic slowdown on teenagers, especially girls getting pregnant and dropping out of school.
She tells us about her sojourn in New Bussa in present day Niger State, when she had to live with her uncle and his family, and about attending the Federal Government Girls College.
Then she mentions that her enrollment at that school marked the beginning of her struggle with self-esteem.
But who wouldn’t be intimidated when your classmates who are children of highly-placed individuals speak better English, and regularly talk about holidays abroad?
That was precisely the experience of the young Oluwatoyin at that time, especially when she didn’t have stories of holidays abroad or well-to-do family to share in school.
She writes that this feeling of inadequacy dogged her life for a long time.
However, her perspective changed after she accepted Christ into her life in 1983. Attaining knowledge of her position in the Lord and how God had good plans for her life, despite her background changed everything.
This is the main thrust of the book.
She is emphatic in delivering her message: “Being born in a particular underserved part of the society or race is only your background and should never put your back on the ground!” (p27).
No one should feel inferior or superior to others. People are wired differently and uniquely, gifted and enabled differently, and should not compare themselves to others.
Rather, the reader is encouraged to not feel less than others.
In the book, the author has counsel for young ones, and young ladies especially, in their early adolescent phase. As they pass through this phase, they are always confronted with self-awareness and identity issues.
The author advises that the young ones should not be pressured into comparing themselves with others, and especially states that no one should feel let down by differences in their body shape and size from others.
She avers (p30) that we are all endowed differently in the divine power of God for diversity. For her, it has nothing to do with intellectual capability.
Trusting in God and working hard will make all the difference eventually.
Shapes and sizes do not determine a person’s success or destiny: “We need to come to terms with the fact that some things are beyond our control… we are all God’s creatures.”
The key theme that reverberates through all the pages of this 7-chapter book is this: love yourself and never downplay yourself in any way.
Each of the 94 pages carries a strand of the author’s message.
The author is emphatic in her submission here. You were created the way you are, do not compare yourself to others. You were wonderfully and fearfully made, do not feel inferior.
There is encouragement for young ones living with disabilities to accept their state and make the best out of it. There is a consistent argument that no one should wish to be someone else.
Indeed, the author insists that no gender – male or female – is inferior or superior to the other.
The author also encourages teenagers to take possession of their emotions (p58) and not allow their emotions to be controlled or influenced by things around them.
Paraphrasing Philippians 4:13 in the Bible, the author submits: “You can exercise self-control and do all things through Christ who strengthens you.” So, she admonishes adolescents to develop themselves and gain confidence.
In fact, the fourth chapter tackles the very issue of mental health and how society has weaponised subject choices for young people.
The author examines the pressure society deploys into pushing children into science classes in schools by claiming that science students are more brilliant than others.
She reports that she fell for this narrative at a point in her schooling days and it affected her performance badly.
She began to excel as soon as she changed to arts class and became the best in several of the arts subjects.
She states that all subject classifications are equal, and will always complement one another. Her recommendations are to find out what you are good at, develop yourself in those areas, and give it all it takes.
In this book, the author discusses how young adolescents can relate with others in society based on their different temperaments, with tips on how to overcome any type of complex.
Again, the bottom line, according to the author, is to understand that God created you, and accept yourself the way you are (P74).
“The next is to look for ways of improving on your area of weakness…”
One key motif in this book is the perpetual reference to God and scripture by the author.
The book is filled with the author’s call on young people and adolescents to acknowledge God’s supreme control over their affairs.
In the last chapter of this book therefore, the author charges the reader to know that the spiritual controls all the other realms (actual title of the chapter).
“Feeling insecure in your God-given abilities is contrary to God’s will for you and it is the devil that strives to keep us feeling that way,” she avers.
She insists ultimately that the voice or advice that you listen to will have great influence on your beliefs, opinions that you form about yourself, and the actions you take.
So, she warns (p83) that you should watch what you watch, listen to or converse about, and the company you keep.
So the message is to embrace yourself, because you are wonderfully and fearfully made by God.
This book is recommended for all young people, adults, parents, social workers and teachers.
